Free Falling

It didn't begin suddenly, one day out of the blue. No, it was a slow process, which took many days. Along the way, she stopped and saw that the area was not where she belonged, but she kept going because the way seemed easier than the path she had been called to. When she felt guilt, she pushed it aside and kept walking on her path. Time and time again, she would stop to look around, but thought that she knew the way and that it would be ok...
One day, she realized she was wrong. Yes, had stopped to look around before, but she was getting tired of this easy path. It was easy and comfortable and deep inside, she knew that was not the way the path should be. But at this point, she was unsure how to go back and didn't know what to do. So she just stood there. What could she do?
Somewhere deep inside, a very soft voice would occaisionally wisper, telling her to just let go. But it was the scarriest thought of all and it was for that reason that she was where she was. A couple people seemed to see her heart, if only a tiny bit and they told her it was time to change. Yes, she knew that, but she was scared and wasn't sure how. Besides, what about her dreams? They seemed impossible from her standpoint, whether she let go or not. What did it matter? She knew it was false security, but she felt safer, thinking she had a little control. Yes, she stood there, unsure what to do...
Maybe someday she would be able to let go, but she didn't think she could do it today. Maybe she had to hit bottom, but the bottom seemed far, though she had already fallen a few feet. How far did she have to go? So, she stood and she cried, unable to move. She was afraid, but longed to reach the breaking point, if only to move. His arms could catch her, maybe, if she could just fall into them.
She did realize what an aweful sinner she was and how she had failed her Father. She might've seemed godly to those who had just met her, but obviously those closest to her had begun to see the deeper part of her heart. But that didn't remove the fear to move, so she continued to stand there, hoping one day soon, she would be able to fall into her Father's arms...